Whether it\u2019s a book, a movie, or a video game, creative works generally exist for a reason. Sometimes it\u2019s to delight, by entertaining with stories or fun gameplay. Other times it\u2019s to inform, with news or by exposing the audience to different perspectives. Or it makes you think, with interesting ideas that challenge you to consider or reflect. The Lord of the Rings: Gollum, however, is a game that does none of these things. Instead, it thrusts you into the role of the titular character without doing anything meaningful with his defining internal conflict, and sends him on a series of missions that are neither fun to play nor interesting to experience. The one question it poses is: why would someone want to play this?<\/p>\n
Playing as Gollum sounded like it might\u2019ve been a decent pitch for a game, since he\u2019s one of the more interesting and famous characters in J. R. R. Tolkien\u2019s fantasy universe. He and Sm\u00e9agol are two sides of the same coin; the good person that was Sm\u00e9agol was tragically corrupted by The One Ring, twisted into this pathetic creature. It\u2019s his clammy bare feet that we step into, ostensibly with the goal of regaining possession of the Ring from Bilbo Baggins. However, most of your time is spent experiencing Gollum\u2019s time as a prisoner during the years between The Hobbit and The Fellowship of the Ring <\/em>in a linear, story-driven series of levels. Prison Simulator: Mordor Edition is sadly less interesting than it sounds. I couldn\u2019t shake the feeling I was supposed to be on a grand Lord of the Rings adventure, and was instead stuck collecting bits and baubles for forgettable NPCs and hiding in bushes to hide from monotonous guard patrols.<\/p>\n There are generally three phases to any level, and they range from uninteresting to just plain bad. There\u2019s the chores phase, in which Gollum goes from one waypoint to another to complete some menial task. There\u2019s always some conceptually different scenario, like crawling through small openings to detonate explosives, but functionally it\u2019s a series of marches across the same areas over and over again. It never feels like there\u2019s any point to it, just busywork. It could be fun to run around with Gollum, thanks to his surprising sprint speed, but he has a stamina meter that depletes in just a few seconds and takes far longer to replenish. Trying to get anywhere involves too little speed, too much waiting, and an unfortunate amount of hearing Gollum choking on his own breath. <\/p>\n The platforming phases are more compelling, but still poorly designed. Spacious rooms with handles to climb, walls to run, and leaps to take bring a faster pace of action, but the loose and floaty way Gollum moves and imprecise controls make it feel like something from the PlayStation 2 era. Having experienced a modern Assassin’s Creed<\/a> or Tomb Raider<\/a> game, here it feels far too easy to jump toward the correct point and fall to your death because you drifted to one side, or missed the part of the ledge that has the white line that establishes exactly where you can grab. The paths are rigidly defined, and often involve blind jumps or best guesses at what the next intended handle is. Rather than a throwback, it comes across as outdated; a poor facsimile of classics like the Prince of Persia<\/a> series. <\/p>\n These issues plagued mediocre stealth games 15 years ago.<\/p>\n Finally there are the stealth segments, which are simply bad. Any time Gollum needs to go from point A to B undetected, it\u2019s going to be a slog. Enemies have extremely limited parol patterns, are terribly nearsighted, and seem to suffer from acute, rapid-onset amnesia, forgetting Gollum ever existed not long after losing sight of him. These are issues that plagued mediocre stealth games 15 years ago, and it\u2019s jarring to see them in 2023. There\u2019s no cat-and-mouse game of outsmarting enemies using interesting abilities and clever level design as you do in something like Dishonored<\/a> or Hitman<\/a>, you just exploit their painfully obvious blind spots with no objective outside of reaching the designated point. <\/p>\n Gollum\u2019s only tools are his ability to sneak quietly, throw rocks, and disappear in tall grass or shadows. Because the enemy AI is surprisingly terrible, doing something as simple as standing on a table or knee-high rock can make you completely immune to capture. I was able to navigate a long stealth section in the Animal Pits of Barad-d\u00fbr by just jumping and grabbing an overhang anytime someone spotted me. Eventually some of the Orcs get crossbows, but even then the threat is minimal.<\/p>\n There\u2019s no combat per se, which makes sense because Gollum is no fighter when it comes to any opponent larger than a hobbit. You do have the option to strangle enemies, but it comes with some odd caveats. First, it doesn\u2019t work on anyone with a helmet. This makes sense for someone in full battle regalia — Sm\u00e9agol\u2019s grubby mitts won\u2019t bend steel, after all. However, what defines a helmet in this game is broadly open to interpretation. Is that orc wearing a hat? Decent chance he\u2019s strangle-proof. Also, strangling only applies to orcs. It makes sense you can\u2019t choke beasts like spiders, but other humanoid races like elves apparently have invincible throats, eliminating the only method to bypass enemies apart from stealth. Which, again, is not good.<\/p>\n